i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Found the puke drawer
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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