3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Randomize
