All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Randomize
