We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
