ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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