Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
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