planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
