I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
