She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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