escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize