My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
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