Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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