...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
