I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
