idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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