The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
