Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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