i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Randomize