I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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