Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off! http://tfl.nu/woe1
  Replies (50) Good night (3436) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from England

  So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'? http://tfl.nu/cyi6
  Replies (28) Good night (942) Bad night (3215)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before http://tfl.nu/b07w
  Replies (12) Good night (5151) Bad night (1096)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon? http://tfl.nu/djkx
  Replies (17) Good night (3948) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom http://tfl.nu/przj
  Replies (9) Good night (3055) Bad night (1069)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin. http://tfl.nu/zjl9
  Replies (6) Good night (3556) Bad night (1109)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM. http://tfl.nu/agqo
  Replies (13) Good night (736) Bad night (2332)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience. http://tfl.nu/n6q9
  Replies (6) Good night (858) Bad night (1584)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids. http://tfl.nu/60tn
  Replies (15) Good night (3265) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (870): I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer. http://tfl.nu/bxkb
  Replies (5) Good night (2277) Bad night (591)
• Favorite

  (355): View more from

  He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (355): He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat http://tfl.nu/brov
  Replies (5) Good night (773) Bad night (430)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you http://tfl.nu/s4l7
  Replies (4) Good night (814) Bad night (412)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made. http://tfl.nu/x9xf
  Replies (1) Good night (602) Bad night (330)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer http://tfl.nu/pgrt
  Replies (5) Good night (300) Bad night (953)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (256): Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list. http://tfl.nu/u42n
  Replies (0) Good night (479) Bad night (407)

Randomize