she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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