I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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