just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
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