I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Life is so much better after having sex.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
