just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
COCAINE IS GR8
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
