Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
