Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
