so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize