If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
