ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
