just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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