You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
