that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
