We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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