Where did you get a picture of my penis
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
