Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
