I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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