I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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