No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
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you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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