Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
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Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
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I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
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