Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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