No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
