Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
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We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
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The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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