i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
