she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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