It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
