it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize
