yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
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Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
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Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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