But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
