I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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