I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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